Sunday, May 8, 2011


I am so tired of defending myself. Those around me do not think of life like I do and they do not see the way I act and behave as a whole picture, as I do. Did you ever get to the point that you know it is not in anyone's better interest to continue to state the truths in your life? I am here. Those around me ask why I do what I do, and they want an answer; but they want me to defend my point of view because they do not want to see things as I do.
People want you to explain; they want you to state your point so they can tell you why you are wrong. They ask why, yet there are so many reasons why, and we can not go into them all. The truth is that the world runs on many threads and they are not all explainable in one setting. As a whole we are doing the best for the people around us. Well some do better that others, but still, why debate? We are still doing the best we can for the level of understanding that we are at.
I have someone that is always looking for an explanation for my behavior. Then they use it to tell me I am not doing justice for them. I understand they feel that way, and in there eyes I am not. So why keep debating this subject? If you do not get what you want either change your mind, understand you can decide to want something different, or move on to find what you want. But why continue to rehash your points over the years and cause drama in your own and others lives.
I do live by what I teach and write here, my heart is at peace with my life; for the first time in my life. I do not write about it until I have learned the lesson, or I could not articulate it so well. So I think, in the bigger picture, I am a good person at heart. I also realize that I am no longer going to argue or defend myself. I will state the way I feel and how I felt at the time; and let others have there interpretations for themselves. Others will always see things the way they want because they are doing there best to process there lives to. No more arguing for me, I want to just be.

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