To day my dad came into my life for the first time in 12 years, but he wanted to see my mom. He has not seen my mom in 30 years. Yet he came with the intention of making amends. What a lot of people do not see is that you can make amends and have the other person say yes on one level, but on another still not see you as a whole person worthy of forgiveness, the healing comes when both grow and heal in the interaction and become whole.
I could sense that it was a moment of time that my father needed to validate that he was not as bad as he himself felt, over all that had gone by. This is an energy of calling back your soul and forgiving yourself for the pain you caused others. I am not sure if my mom could see the transformation I saw in her but I know it healed her too.
My mom has had a feeling of unworthiness in her life time that she has never addressed, yet it over shadowed all she does. Still to this day she talks of how she was not treated fairly by her father. I am sure that other than me, no one else has apologized to her. I also know she dismissed that as due to her, in all my wrongness. I was so happy to see the healing in both of them, something I did not think of before.
Many times we change and look for confirmation in those we love, or those around us, as a barometer. Much of the time others are busy keeping us in the box of our old behavior. So we never forgive ourselves fully. This is an energy exchange that keeps people down or in the case of forgiveness, empowers us. When we know that we are forgiving, the energy can be released and we no longer carry the burden of that experience.
All we do has the power to heal others, and I now see that it heals us too. The law of intention, when you intend to heal, help, see the world whole; it becomes whole, and all those in it.
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