Teaching

We all have to transform our lives to be an effective teacher. Even if you are a school teacher you need to go to school and this process take you through a transformation. What we learn in a life time is how we act and how we act is teaching at all times.
     
All good and effective teachers know that they learn as they go. Life and teaching is a moving and energetic process and has to be open to energy so it can teach what is needed in the moment. If you do not learn from all of life you become a pom pass , egotistical teacher. All this does is make you an out cast. Knowing that you learn from all of life keeps you humble.
       
Humility is a sign of a great teacher, and if you are privileged to find a teacher on this path, look for humility. Or should I say sit and feel there humility, that is the true test of ones abilities, to feel there energy sincerity. All of what I teach or write is not something you can learn in books; it is something that you have to live, practice and exude.
     
Look for teachers that will live in the moment and teach you what you need to learn, not what they have decided you need to know. We are all human and have our own agendas; but some of us can sit and feel what is right to say in that moment. In the moment is what needs to be heard and learned.

Enjoy

I admit I grew up being told to work first and enjoy later. This has been my motto and work ethic all my life. In my younger days it worked. I had time to enjoy at the end of the day. Now that I am older there is always something else to do and I have children that have an endless supply of requests that stream through there mouths. I do for them because on a cosmic level we are all here to serve one another. At the end of the day I see I did not enjoy. I zoned out, trying to get to the enjoy part.
     
It has recently come to my attention, through revelation, that I am missing all the "enjoy" parts of life. I came to see that the enjoy is in the thoughts we have as we do all the rest of life. I clean a lot of poop, laundry, dishes and dinner, all with little or no help, with requests for my attention all the while. I started to realize it was the gratitude in all this mess. I was missing, and that came to me a few days ago.
     
I started to see the true miracle, or preciousness of it all. That these people, places and situations would not be in my life if it weren't for the grace or miracle that holds them there. Think of it! All the energy that is expended in connecting and correlating all of life! That energy has to hold together tiny cells and help us breath, digest, move, walk, talk and help the flowers grow, the sun to come up, the rain and it does all this for all the world. What a true feet of organizing power and cooperation.
     
I started to understand that I will not be able to enjoy life that same way ever again, yet I can enjoy it on a whole other level. I can see the miracle in it all and understand that the live around me is a true blessing. It is held in place for the true joy in life and it is a true joy to see it now. I will enjoy life more now that ever because I do not have to wait for the end to appreciate it.

Suffering

Sometimes we say that someone hasn't suffered enough. This is a selfish kind of thinking that says,"we should be the judge of others pain and suffering." We are not able to judge anyone else's pain. We just can not know all the factors involved in someones else's grief or learning processes.
       
The kind of suffering I am talking about is the kind that comes through in the related and future dealing with the people and situation that we learn from. I am talking about when we make others suffer injustly over our own short commings and then expect them to know we learned from the action and consequence.
     
When we suffer we can learn. It is in the sufffering with our inner energy that we learn the true meanings for our choices and the results are that we approach the people with a sense of humility. I am not talking about humility that says that we are sorry and that we know our place in the pecking order because of our actions. I am talking about humbelness that says, "I know I have treated you unfairly and I am sorry, but I am an equal person and have learned." This kind of energy does not have to be spoken. This kind of energy is revealed in the patience of the learned person. This sort of humility has a space that allows the others around you to see that you have changed before they have to deal with you in an unprotected way. The energy speaks for itself. Energy always conveys to others your true motives.
   
Your inner energy wants you to allow it to suffer with it, this is the healing process that helps the energy itself to purify your choices so you learn from them. This kind of inner relationship and suffering is not about why we have to suffer it is about knowing how we make others suffer. It is a relationship that the energy itself uses the time to show you how you have hurt others and helps you feel whole and humble in the future dealings with all people. Suffering with your inner energy is a healing to make your life peaceful and whole.

Cry For Me

Have you ever started to think of someone or something and just had an overwhelming feeling of wanting to start crying? Do you just cry, without thought, without judgment? Or do you think that they need your help? Do you think of the last bad interaction that you had with them and cry for how it turned out, or how they have hurt you? Energy itself will ask you to cry for those that have hurt you. When you consciously ask to heal those that have hurt you, you are instantly healed yourself. Energy does this as the fastest way to heal you. The only problem is that we do not want to help those that we think have hurt us, so it takes longer to heal.

Did you now that you can cry for someone else? Did you know that that could heal their pain and that, in turn,  heals the collective energy pain? That is the highest form of healing; to know that you were overwhelmed by the pain of humanity, and that your tears were shed for the healing of the whole.

I have a little bird that has survived in my care. In the quiet times, I feel the magic that is contained in its existence. I am in awe that it is alive, but on one occasion I felt a deep pain for the mother that lost it. I have seen how birds and animals look and stand over there dead babies. There is a collective energy that is present in all living things that is as powerful as creation itself. To sit quietly and witness it and feel it brings awe into our world.

When I felt the pain of this little bird and the pain of its mother, I had an overwhelming sense of wanting to start crying. I knew that I could cry for them. This is no small task, You have to be able to go in and feel the pain, to allow the tears to heal and to walk away with the knowledge that you have just healed a small part of the collective pain that is growing in all the world.

There is much pain between mother and child for many of millennium and it is this that can help make others pain bearable enough to live another day.

Knowing we are here to let this energy pass through us and heal it on the way is a gift that will transform the world. It is the outlet that the energy itself uses to make life bearable for the people that are not able to be conscious in this life. So, cry. Do not judge.  Just know that you are whole and that you are making the world a better place for it.

A Little Bird

A little bird came to grace our home yesterday. As all these birds that we get in the spring, I had little hope that it would make it through the night. I have a ten year old that loves animals, and every spring we have a tossed out wild bird that we care for.
     
I did not have my usual worries about theses things when I went to bed. I was thinking of all the rest we had in the past, and I said a little prayer. Something along the lines that it will be, "ok"either way and that if it was meant to be, let it live. Some how, I knew that that prayer was the power that was going to bring life to it.
       
I had forgotten about it in the morning and when I came down I heard a little peeping! There was a quiet happiness in my heart, and little thought went in to its survival, and morning feeding. As I was walking the dog, I felt strong this morning.  I realized that the background fear had left me, in some way. My mind is clear and I feel left with the gratitude I have been praying so much for the past few weeks.
     
I am in a spot of change again in my life, everything is a little unknown at this time. I knew for a few days now I needed something to fill my thoughts so my inner energy could do its magic. It seems, I have been sent my blessing; the energy, in form of a bird, to get me through this time.
       
I am so grateful and in awe of how life really works when you really start to understand it. Somehow as delicate as a hairless bird and as magical as miracles can be.

Touch Our Lives

The people and situations of our lives are supposed to touch our lives. There is an energy that is here to transform us, it is in the details of our lives. We are not meant to effect others and walk away, although that can touch your life too. Yet the family we have is the hardest to learn form; those are the details that touch us the most.
   
I live with my mom, and she does not want to be effected by my life. She is set in keeping me at a distance. So I will not make changes in her life. This is nice, yet we never grow this way. We never come into our fullest potential. The only way be become the best is if  we learn new ways, and others are the carriers of that new ways.
   
When you hold others away from you, you are energetically saying they are not worthy of emotional investment. You are wanting them to see you as the best, because they have not succeeded in anything worthy of learning. Now you may think this, yet it is very untrue. Energy collides our lives to learn, it is in perpetual motion to better itself, i.e. us, the energy beings. If you refuse to learn, it brings on disease and premature death, you are blocking energy, by refusing to grow. This block slows down the energy frequency of your cells and then causes illness.
   
Others are not supposed to think you are the best; you are supposed to think they are the best. Life is supposed to be a mutual admiration society, with humility injected to keep us humble about the gifts we bring to the world. The next time someone upsets you, ask your inner energy how you are supposed to see the situation. What about the exchange should transform you?

Spiritual Rule #1

The laws governing the spiritual world are as concrete as the physical rules of gravity. The first one is to stay in the present time. It is an easy concept, yet extremely hard to do. I will admit that you have to have an iron will, and extreme self discipline. All of this is helped along by your inner guide. Many say that I am very militant in my thinking. I know that that is what it takes to be good at something; discipline. Ask anyone that runs marathons, makes millions and those that obtain self consciousness; it takes discipline.
      
I have spent most of my life being undisciplined, and have had a rough life for it. I also know that as I have become more disciplined my mind, body and spirit have become more congruent. By congruent, I mean that they all work together. This has brought peace and a sense of knowledge that transcends all that I have learned.
       
The deeper you come to becoming congruent, the more you realize that you have to give up all thoughts that keep you from your present moment. What we realize is that we spend a lot of time correcting others and situations in our minds. What these thoughts are are a form of vengeance on others and the world. A reduced form of background, mind warfare we have grown to love because of our need to be right and prove this to others.
         
Complaining and wishing anything is other than it is will keep you form living in the moment. We have grown up to believe that what we see, feel and touch; or prove we are right, is of more value than our authentic selves. When we live in this world we are always subject to humiliation and pain, from retaliation of those we have overpowered in this level.
  
Being in the moment is our only true power. You can affect change from here and live a peaceful life. So use your will power to be in service to the present moment, you will have the power of the universe backing you.

Reason

We have a deep need to reason, but reason is not in our best interest. We seem to think that we can reason; the reality is that we can not. Reasoning takes our energy and we need it to heal our lives. We also can't reason because we do not have all the information we need to see the whole of the world and how our circumstances fit into it. Our small thinking in a vast universe is not enough information to lead us to a satisfying conclusion. We also need to remember we are reasoning on a different level than the circumstances develop and happen. We are trying to fit our logic, based on how we logic, on to a universal logic that is able to make things happen for the better of the whole.
           
Now I do believe that for a brief time we should look back to understand how we added to or attracted the problems in our lives; but never try to reason. Let go of the need to reason on this level. It is like asking your inner energy why is the world doing this to me? The energy can not answer that; it is a selfish question that implies that the world does things just for you; it does not. You are part of a whole that helps all those around you; even to the point of smiling at a clerk in the store, or not. You effect people just driving in your car, because your thoughts are the energy that they feel, as they drive.
           
Reason should be reduced to help you move in the direction that will help you understand we are connected to the energy within all of us. It should be the logic that helps you methodically reason a thread in your thinking that connects all you do to the energy within you; this is your power. Tell yourself that everything happens for the best; you may not believe it at first. You inner energy will show you how it is so. What you cling to as a thought, even if you do not believe it at first will work its way through your energy system until you know it. That is how you learned all the things you know now, even if they are not true, you believe them. Re-train your brain to think of things that conserve your energy and help you use its power to the fullest.
           
Reason is not a place to waste our energy, it is a dead-end road when it comes to energy. If you want to take advantage of your highest potential, use reason as a tool to unify your thinking. Energy will have a clear path to healing the world, and you, if you use your reasoning skills in behalf of the whole.

Freedom

Freedom of spirit is the ability to see yourself as an energetic being and not feel responsible for the restrictions that others live by. Freedom is a spiritual truth that we feel to our cores. Much of this freedom we know as our heritage is acted out in some negative way, energetically inflicting pain on ourselves and others. Inherently we know that we are free in spirit, yet learning to release ourselves in the physical world is the path of allowing our energy to free us of the lies of this world.
         
I see every day that those around me, and no one else is different, that the people in my life want me to live according to their views. Now I will admit they have a truth to some degree in there logic, but their logic is based on the physical world alone. It does not take into account that we are spiritual beings and have the energetic power to create anything we have been inspired to create. Is can be a great frustration, a lack of freedom in many respects. If you can choose to see this life energetic scenario as a choice, you can see that they are trying to get you to behave in their way so they do not have to grow in their emotional development. It is also an emotional development for you, and me, that we learn to see yourselves as part of this energy but removed from the limitations it has to offer, otherwise disconnect from this energetic lie society lives under.
         
Freedom comes when we see that we are strong enough to create our realities, knowing that we are part of the whole but not governed by it. We can live in a world that is at peace with what is and feel free of the limitations this world has to offer.
 

Inspired Thought

When you have a thought that is inspired, it will repeat on different occasions. This is a clue that you should follow the guidance that you have received. These thoughts will repeat in your head and make you feel good. They are also ideas just outside of your ability. Always your inner energy is pushing you forward, wanting you to learn and stretch out of your current thought. How fast you follow this guidance will determine how fast you change your life.
       
Be determined in thinking only of the step at hand. Your single-mindedness will keep the guidance in focus and protect you from faltering. Each step you follow will bring you closer to the life you will feel complete with. Sometimes the guidance does not fit in with what we think we want, if we follow it, we end up with better lives than we could have believed in.
     
I have been struggling with this myself. I have one friend that has helped me keep what I thought of as my life intact. Yet the reality is that I pray every night that my life will change, and I want it to change in a way that no one I know; knows much about. My inner guidance has been to let go of some of the involvement in this relationship; but for selfish reasons I never felt I could survive. I recently realized that I needed to spend more time with my inner energy; OK, I knew, I was avoiding the guidance. Now that I have followed it, spent just three nights just quiet, I feel more at peace.
     
My level of peace has increased because I brought my level of continuity up higher. Before I was thinking of my inner energy and then of I had a pain of loneliness I would call, fill my time with physical world things. Now I have found a deep peace in my seamless connection to my inner energy. I find myself eating less and thinking more about my inspiration, leaving the rest. There is always a thought that will let in a fear, show you a worry. Now I refuse to listen to those ordinary thoughts. They got me into this mess in the first place.
     
Thoughts of inspiration are easer to think about also. They release me from pain of life and create a new world that I know I will be doing more in service to the world. After all one of my inspired thoughts was to do this blog, and that has brought healing and peace to my life that I never had before.

Knowing

The truth of wholeness is that we live, feel and know we exude an energetic power. The path of wholeness is to slowly learn that you are emitting energy that changes the world around you. I have said this for a year now and it has been in my mind as a peace of knowledge, yet not as a from of living. This is two different worlds of living. We can know something as a form of knowledge we have learned, yet we have not known it as a way of life. There is an energy pattern hear that has to be lived.
     
A person can go to school for six years studying about honey, travel around the world lecturing about honey. They can call themselves a honey expert and have works published about honey, but have never tasted honey. They have never experienced honey, they do not know honey in there being, as an energy knowing.
     
Knowing the reality of what I say is to know wholeness and healing. It is to follow a path to your highest potential through living it; not studying it and acquiring more knowledge. Start your relationship with your inner energy now and start to experience your inner power now. Take the time to acquire the skills that help you feel the reality of this knowledge. Doing is the only path to knowing.

Volunteer

The energy of the volunteer is of service to the world. Believe it or not, there is a quality of volunteering that you can grow and mature from.
         
At first, we are taught that we volunteer in the community. This is nice, but it is physical. It gets you acknowledgment. In a selfish way it lets you feel good because you have openly helped and the world knows it. The next level of volunteer is going to help others in hospice or some other kind of other pain. That starts to effect your life because you are getting involved emotionally. Now we all get involved emotionally, but that is not how you can help, to the best of your ability. Remember to focus on the good, or inner energy, is what transforms the situation.
         
The last level is when you learn to volunteer with something deep, like taking care of an aging person, or nursing. To be able to do this with out depleting your emotional resources is the highest form of emotional maturity. It is to learn that fallowing this energy is a calling, and that it has to be done in the energy itself, regardless of the outcome. That you do make a difference, even when no one acknowledges that. To know that you are part of a bigger energy and that energy works through you is the evolution of the volunteer energy.

Integrity

I have to tell you, you will not be able to live with integrity until you have fallowed your inner energy. When you live life, it is in the physical world, and we share, barter, and steal in this world. There is not integrity in this life, because you will always need something that you will rely on others to help you get. If you know their energy, which we do, and they will not help unless you lie, steal or shave the truth, you will not be able to live in integrity. Now when you move your thought into your energy world, that world starts to help you get the things you need with out those physical world means.

At some point in the transition I started to question how I could teach my children the value of honesty and still lie around them. I had a long talk about it with them, explaining how important it is to live with generosity, not judgment. This energy of generosity is giving and people do not feel obligated to lie to you to get what they need. I also explained that when inner energy is the way we express ourselves we feel confident enough to be honest, and not let others judgment, rule our minds. It is through living in that energy that we become better people and then we start to define our selves as the good people we are.
       
It all has a snowball effect. Being able to live with integrity creates integrity. Living through inner energy is freedom of the heart that you are creating in a whole way. Until you have this view, safety in the truth is not a concept we can live by. We are unable to feel safe moving into the unknown, to create total honest lives. Little by little, the energy world brings you into living through it, creating a world of integrity.

Changes

Your inner energy is a magnet, that attracts to you all the things you think of. The pain of that is, that you may not like what is happening, so you will experience more of what you do not want. In the end the energy is making changes in your thinking, boiling down your thoughts to a simple one, you are cared for by me; the inner energy. The semi-conscious pain is a way to refine your thoughts and in the end, your life becomes peaceful, miraculous, and all that you want.
 
A long the way you learn that what you thought you wanted was not what you wanted, or that it is no longer needed. As you journey with your guide you will find that you are wanting different things and need things you did not know you needed in the beginning. Sometimes, you can boil down an emotion, or what you think you want, to a true need. Emotions are the perfect guide. You can feel the need of wanting to support yourself, and boil it down to an energy life lesson. This is the energy of self support, and freedom. Now, all of us need this for survival. So it is a big energy pull, but if you step back you will see that your are supported, even if that support does not come from who. or what. you think it should. Now remember that, energy rule "all is one", now you are being supported by yourself. I have for a long time struggled with this one, sometimes in my life selling my soul, or emotional development for support. We all do this at some point, but the idea is that when it is a common theme, it is worth understanding deeper.
 
Your universal energy will support you, monetarily if needed. It is the energy that creates, moves and redistributes money. All you need to do is see it the way it sees the money. I have been wanting to support myself for a while, but I have someone in my life that wants to support me. This has caused me a great deal of pain, because I would like to change the dynamics of that relationship. Today I gave up and asked for help, to see this differently. I guess what I am trying to say, is that, energy itself has to support you the only way it can until you see it differently. Now I see that the energy is in fact supporting me, the only way it can, because I think of it that way. Now I see it supporting me and have freed my mind of the thought of non-support. Changing my mind of its original medium of support, is the freeing of the thought of how my life is working, Now, a new thought of how I will be supported can come in. The new thought then can change the physical world.
 
Energy can and wants to change your life but the change can only happen as fast as we can let go of how we see the world we live in or how fast we can let energy itself be the only thing we think of.

Patience

I will tell you that impatience is going to be a huge stumbling block in your ability to create. Patience is not something any of us have or get instantly. It is cultivated and courted. I know that sounds funny but life, as I have learned, is a dance of letting go of my old ways and learning new. This all happens with out knowing what is going on but when I look back, I can see that is how it has gone. I see that each time I have learned something new, I got impatient that it did not create instant change. When I fell in a pile of ordinary human despair, giving up on my desire to have the change, my inner energy would bring me peace. That's when the change would begin. I have seen this cycle all along but never to the extent that I have understood it last night. I have been working on bringing me the ability to support myself. Now I have heard this before but I was reading again last night from Depak Chopra. He was saying that, the dance of what was and what is to come has to balance. I see that now, the energetic spin of the two hold each other in place. If it were not this way, you would implode with the new knowledge, not knowing how it fits into your life. I agree now, and understand this concept. I used to want a spontaneous awaking, but how would I deal with this with all the responsibility in my life? I know that creation gives you what is needed, and I know that I need to show the world that it can be done. You and I can be ordinary people, and live ordinary lives; working toward a higher emotional intelligence, still obtain it, and have the lives we live.
     
So life is a dance of what is and what is to come. Patience is the gentle thread that allows it to happen, knowing that the energy within will do all the work.

Forgive

I have thought about this for a while. Forgiveness is a way to heal, move on, and know that you want peace more that anything else.  I have been thinking about what to write about forgiveness and my mom gave something to write about last night.
 
I went to a class last night and left my kids home with my mom. She has to take care of my three year old, but my older ones were here too. They usually come with me. I got home on a spiritual high. It was a class about inner peace. I enjoyed it a lot, but I really went for the teacher. I like her and crave being around like minded people. Anyway, when I got home, my ten year old told me that my mom had spent the night rifling through my personal things. She was looking through my drawers, reading papers I keep in them, and looking through my closet. I am so glad I came home full of inner peace! I am, well used to be, the sort of person that would have hung you out to dry for such a transgression. I had all the usual thoughts. I don't do this to her. What do I say? Then I realized that she is only doing what she knows how to do; be disrespectful. She can not respect herself, so how can she respect me? I would venture to say that she has no concept of respect, because she has not defined herself, or what her values are. What is there to respect when you are not a whole person? She sees herself as a collection of good decisions she has made about money. Others do not live up to that measure, so we do not deserve respect.

I never got mad, I just rode that spiritual high all through the night. I stayed up thinking about all this. I realized that I did not have anything to hide anyway, and that I wanted to have a better relationship with my mom. So I asked her this morning how I could help her, maybe do a little laundry. We had a nice conversation and I came up to write. I see it all as testimony that my inner power has transformed me. I also feel confident that it is all energy that is working to get me out of here. I also trust that the same inner energy is working on its own form of justice. I feel good that I did not allow her behavior to effect me and that I still treated her with love. I am sure that it is not all my doing. I have great power behind all that I do, even forgiving.

Mind Your Own Business

Did your mom tell you to mind your own business when you were a kid? Mine did. But, I am sure she did not know the extent or depth of what our business is. When you start to communicate with your inner self you will find that you still chat and think about others and still try to figure out what they do, or what they are doing, means. The truth is, that it is not something you can change, are supposed to change, or need to know about. I know, now you say, "but they effect me," and they do on some level. You effect them on the same level too. Let me explain this. When you think, yes, just think of someone, you are putting yourself in their body. You may think this is impossible but the truth is that you are energy, and not a body. You do not have the power to control people as in the movies, but you do have the power to control them in a energetic way. You can very well think good or bad about someone and have them feel good or bad in their own head. They may complain that they do not feel well or feel out of sorts. The other person will not know it is you but they will blame something in the outer world that irritates them. Now if you think something good about them they will feel good around you. They will eventually start to feel good and become happy. I know. I do this with the people I live with. People act out the energy around them until they become conscious of energy and that they are energy beings. When you become aware that the world, people, and collective energy itself can effect you, you can choose to mind your own business.
 
Now what I mean; to mind your own business is that you only pay attention and live through your own energy flows. This takes time, practice, and knowledge of how your energy feels. Energy comes in when you are around someone, or they think of you, and you may just have a thought of them. You may have some insight or intuition about them, but not all information is to be acted upon. Some intuition is for you to understand them, and be able to stay away from them. You may feel that they do not like you or feel their judgment. Do not respond. This information is to protect you! It is allowing you to move away from them with no conflict. People are allowed to have different ideas and they do not have to understand yours. As a matter of fact, you will do more damage by telling them your ideas. Now, if you get the feeling in your throat to talk, you must. This is the energy to speak up. Energy will use you to further itself and a restriction in the throat or feeling of movement to speak is guidance to tell your side. Always follow your feeling, and do it even when you do not feel you have anything to gain. It should be a gut reaction, working with you heart. You can redeem a situation by prayer. This is the knowing that your inner energy will use what you have said for is own use.

The key is, to do this and not think about it again. Leave it to the omnipotence of the universal energy. Minding your own business is knowing that you can only control your self, thoughts, and reactions. The rest of life has to come from the an energy larger than your self.

Beautify The World

I am so happy for the neighbors! They are doing so much outside work and making their and our world nice. I know it is strange to be happy for others' prosperity, but it is mine and yours too. In the world of energy the higher truth is that all is one. So, always be happy for any beauty prosperity brings. It brings up the collective energy of prosperity its self.
 
As I was growing I saw others unhappy about others' gain, or find some fault in it. Now I understand they just did not, or do not, have the same knowledge that I do about it being good for the world. Still, I see others complaining about the progress and finding problem with the construction. Yet I keep peeking out the window to see how well it all looks. I love the idea that people get what they want and need and when it is over it will look so pretty. I also love the idea that when you take the time and money to invest in something it has energetic love and devotion in it. It glows and shines with your attention.
 
There are some homes you drive by that have a lackluster air about them. I always think, "wouldn't it be nice if they would just buy one gallon of paint a paycheck?" Invest a little at a time, and over time, their home will have that loved look. Beauty is part of our souls, it is a reflection of the infinite depth of what we are. Beauty is a calling, just look in nature. It is the result of our blossoming in mature growth. You can see the evidence of what I say all around you this Spring. We all feel a true connection to nature. It is because we are truly connected to it. We are it. When I had a home, I used to sit on the couch in the front room, in the quiet of the night, and think of how beautiful it all was I also felt so prosperous. I would sit there and feel the beauty peace and contentment of myself and the world.
 
So surround your self with the beauty you love, and know you are that beauty. Feel the beauty in yourself and love the vast infinite being you are.

I Know I Am a Problem

Yes, I know I am a problem. I can name many of the things I need in life that I cannot supply for myself right now, and remember when I say me, I include my three kids. So, the list is like this; food, clothes, electricity, water, gas, $250.00 a month for my car, a home and all the things that come up in between there when you have kids. These are all things that we all need in life, but, like many in this world now, I am at the mercy of others to fill those needs. I also know I can give a lot too, I have an eternity of unconditional love to give. That is something you cannot pay for; but I know it is what we all need just as much as the money it takes for all of those other things.

We all need something at some time in our lives. You cannot avoid needing something on some level in a life time. Even if you had a wealth of money for your lifetime, there would be times that you needed help of some kind. "I know," you say, "I will pay for it." But there are some things that money cannot buy. True unconditional love, devotion, time, compassion, and companionship. I know these have a wealth of value and that they are belittled in this world. I also know that even if the people that are supplying my monetary backbone find me a problem they could choose to love me anyway. I know I choose to love them even though they see and feel me as a problem. When they see me this way, they are saying what I give does not count. That's what I am really giving. My essential me is unworthy, because it does not buy something, or produce a physical result. These same people could see what I do and see me as a blessing, knowing that the world needs love at this time in history, but you cannot see two worlds at the same time, when you chose the physical world as your value.
 
I am well aware that some people in this life see, and express their feelings, that I am a problem. I also know that I am not a problem in the world that counts. I am a true blessing. My needs have the ability to bring out the best in someone or the worst. But either way, I have chosen to be a blessing to all, and to the world of eternal energy.

Empty Apologies

Did you ever tell someone that you were sorry for hurting their feelings and know that it would not matter in the end? I went to talk to a lady today that told me that I was the only parent who told her that she was doing something wrong, and that it hurt her feelings. This, apparently, hurt her feelings for days, she was so upset. Well, I said that I was sorry and, indeed, I genuinely felt sorry. But, I knew that it was hollow. You see, when you apologize for hurting someone, you are apologizing to their ego. The ego is a hollow entity. So, when you use your emotions to make people behave, or do what you think is right, you are left feeling empty. I was apologizing to a feeling, not even to her, as the beautiful being that I know that she is, not even this emotion. I know in my heart that she just feels fresh now in her anger. She is mulling over and over, thinking of how right she is. I know that she does not feel better about the apology because her soul is not healed from it. Her soul itself is not wounded by the exchange, it needed no apologies. So she will still feel empty.

Your inner self is stronger that the world's feelings and perceptions. It does not get hurt feelings. It is not hurt by anything that happens and that is the essential you. Your inner guide will use emotions to communicate to you and help you know when to change or do something differently. Inner selves do not think of the feelings the same way that we do either. If you feel hurt by something that someone said, it could be a clue to see how you may be taking things personally, or that you are letting old memories cloud how you are dealing in this moment. All of your emotions are there to help you grow. They are guides to look inside for inner guidance and growth. We, the people, think our emotions are for eradicating, so we can have a stable and secure life. Change is hard for the ego. It likes complete control so it does not have to change. It likes the outside power of its childish ways. When you learn that you are bigger, deeper, and far stronger with out the egoist emotions, you are not happy with them anymore . I do have to say that it is also an inner guide thing to want stability of the emotions. Your body and emotional system are not designed to have much fluctuation in emotion. This is also a call to your inner guide to mature you into learning that you are untouched by others' actions. Their actions do not effect the essential inner you. We all know in our core that we are deeper, stronger, and powerful.

People that have not learned to feel themselves as there inner selves, or to control there minds, will not feel satisfied by the exchanges they have. They are talking through, and perceiving themselves, as  hollow entities, lacking the power of spirit.  All of life will be empty, and feel emotionally unstable. So, do not settle for empty apologies, become whole. Follow your inner guide. Just be.