Loved or Trapped?

The way we talk will tell the truth about how we love. Our minds are tricksters, they like to make us think we do things for great reasons; but our language gives away our true motives. I will tell you that when you do realize the reality of the thoughts you think, your motives become pure. Energy runs through you, bringing life to all you do, and you. Yet we as humans have the free will to do what we want with that energy.
       
We all start out on a low level of understanding about love, we are taught this kids, to love our family. This small way is a physical way the tribe, or family keeps us under wraps. They teach us to love back even if love hurts, this is the physical way of keeping the tribe alive. Now understand this is energy, and we act it out with out even knowing about it. Anyway, energy comes into us and we say we are doing things out of love, yet we are really trying to get others to think we are the best, and change them so they will conform to what we want.
       
Now the truth can be found in what we say, or what we get upset about. I also want to say again that what we do is pure; but if you do not understand it, it is not pure love. This is the definition of consciousness. OR maybe you have added the weight of the physical world and made it a trap.
         
Here is the example, I have a friend, ok, ex-husband that has always wanted me to come back to him. We have remained friends and he helps me out a lot, both monetarily and companionship wise. Now, he has chosen, for four years to work on his own, not get a steady job. He has gone through four different company startups and dissolutions. All this was his choice to make a company and make it rich, so he could provide for us as a family. Now, along the way he has not been a steady provider and we have been in poverty all along. Now I left him for other reasons too, and money is only one of them. Well his choice to say that he was going to provide and then not do so. I can respect a person that knows there limits and says they can't provide, that is honest, honesty is respectable. Holding someone captive until you get it together is not admirable. Back to the subject, Language, he continues to be upset with me when I am not happy with him, or am not happy to see him. His argument is, "I have never worked so hard, why can't you be happy".  I have been trying to explain that we need a break, I see the energy as he wants to fill the energy place that provides the money for me as a family. I also know that if he is honest and says that he cant provide The energy will flow from some other place, energy flows were there is a need. If I do not rely on him to fill the need, energy itself has to find another out let. I also knowthat the time apart will heal us as individuals